It is somehow weird to have to talk about this, but people need to know what to do when they visit a newborn baby! So, let’s talk about it!
Here are some simple rules to consider:
1. Wait for them to invite you over… don’t show up uninvited!
It is rude and definitely not something the new family wants. They need time to adjust to all the changes, and they really need to make up a routine that works for them, so don’t ruin that!
2. Don’t be late… it is not cool!
If you said you’ll be there in an hour, then arrive within that hour, not three hours later. They might be asleep, or feeding the baby, or having a bath, or doing anything else a normal family does. They are building a routine, respect that!
3. Don’t wear all the perfume you have in the house!
The baby surely doesn’t care that you have a new perfume and the mother will not appreciate either. Also, try not to smoke right before you go visit, and maybe don’t eat that garlic mayo sandwich. The baby doesn’t know all the smells yet, you don’t want that baby to think you are friends with Dracula or something, right?
4. Leave your phone in your bag!
Don’t start taking photos of the baby, the mother and the father! Their lack of sleep, nerves and everything else might end up with you being put on the “don’t invite them over again” list… please be considerate! If the parents want a picture with you and the baby, they will offer when they are ready to!
5. Don’t be sick, ill or carrying germs with you!
I know, it’s tricky, but if you have 90% of your work colleagues with the flu, you will probably get it too, so maybe postpone the visit for when you’re actually sure you are ok. That tinny little creature hasn’t got an immune system yet, can you understand that? You can pop pills and antibiotics, but what is the baby gonna do?
6. Try not to shout or laugh like a lunatic!
The little bundle of joy is new on this planet, remember? Babies are generally protected by their mother’s belly while they are in there, when they are out, everything is extremely new! So, hearing a crazy laughter, or someone shouting isn’t the most pleasurable think for them and they might start crying, is that really necessary? Is that the first impression you want to give to that poor baby?
7. A visit is a visit, you are not moving in the house now!
You should be there for an hour max. Remember, people are getting used to the baby, it is their little family, their circle, you are an outsider who is just visiting, so try to keep it short. Put yourself in their situation and anticipate what they want to do, maybe they need to sleep (and you should understand why).
8. Be polite!!!!
People tend to forget how fragile a mother is… don’t tell her she still has the belly fat, she doesn’t need to hear that, she knows!!! Don’t tell her she looks horrible and that she needs to sleep more, she knows!!! Tell her she did an amazing job, and give compliments as much as you can, a mother needs that, it helps her emotionally! Would you like people to tell you that your hair looks horrible?
9. Offer to help or do some shopping!
Buy some milk, water, something they might need. It is only reasonable to do so when you visit someone. Just think that the mother might be breastfeeding, so don’t bring her chocolates, she won’t be able to eat them and it is NOT cool! Google helps, just see what you can buy or bring to a mother and the newborn baby, it is not that hard!!!
These things being said… are you actually ready to visit a family with a newborn baby?
Just think: if that was your own baby, how would you feel, and what would you do?
10. And, for the love of God, WASH YOUR HANDS when you walk in the house. No one wants to know what you’ve touched before or what you’ve done with your hands, so don’t touch the poor little baby with your dirty hands, ok? Even the wheel of your car has germs all over it, and you wouldn’t eat without washing them before, would you?
Seriously: Picture yourself in the parent’s shoes and understand what they are going through, OK?